“In my scientific opinion, when comparing the two theories, FSM theory seems to be more valid than classic ID theory. “In my scientific opinion, when comparing the two theories, FSM theory seems to be more valid than classic ID theory.” Allow equal time for other alternative ‘theories’ like FSMism, which is by far the tastier choice.” “If Intelligent Design is taught in schools, equal time should be given to the FSM theory and the non-FSM theory.” See what impressively credentialed top scientists have to say: Within these pages, Bobby Henderson outlines the true facts– dispelling such malicious myths as evolution (“only a theory”), science (“only a lot of theories”), and whether we’re really descended from apes (fact: Humans share 95 percent of their DNA with chimpanzees, but they share 99.9 percent with pirates!) Still others are drawn to the Church’s flimsy moral standards, religious holidays every Friday, or the fact that Pastafarian heaven is way cooler: Does your heaven have a Stripper Factory and a Beer Volcano? Intelligent Design has finally met its match-and it has nothing to do with apes or the Olive Garden of Eden. Pastafarians? Some say it’s the assuring touch from the FSM’s “noodly appendage.” Then there are those who love the worship service, which is conducted in pirate talk and attended by congregants in dashing buccaneer garb. What drives the FSM’ s devout followers, a.k.a. pasta, and noodle jokes, none of which you will find in the Christian Bible, which I suppose could be taken. According to church founder Bobby Henderson, the universe and all life within it were created by a mystical and divine being: the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. If I didn’t want it to feel good when you did it I would have added spikes, or something.About The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti MonsterĬan I get a “ramen” from the congregation?!īehold the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM), today’s fastest growing carbohydrate-based religion. If the other person is into it, however (pursuant to #4), then have at it, take pictures, and for the love of mike, wear a condom! Honestly, it’s a piece of rubber. The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM) is a world-wide phenomenon- blanketing the internet and college campuses across the globe- and our. And I told you to love your fellow man, can’t you take a hint?Ĩ. I’d really rather you didn’t do unto others as you would have them do unto you if you are into, um, stuff that uses a lot of leather / lubricant / lass Vegas. I am the creator.ħ. I’d really rather you didn’t go around telling people I talk to you. I might be a complex-carbohydrate omniscient being, but I enjoy the simple things in life. You may dismiss this group as a joke or a spoof church, but some fools take this religion seriously. They believe that a flying spaghetti monster created the universe. Living in peace, loving with passion, and lowering the cost of cable Ever heard of the Pastafarian This is the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM). Eat, then go after the b******.Ħ. I’d really rather you didn’t build multimillion-dollar churches / temples / mosques / shrines to my Noodly Goodness when the money could be better spent (take your pick):Ĭ.
PASTAFARIAN BIBLE GOSPEL TV
As for anyone who might object, I think the expression is go f*** yourself, unless they find that offensive in which case they can turn off the TV for once and go for a walk for a change.ĥ. I’d really rather you didn’t challenge the bigoted, misogynist, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach.
One is not better than the other, unless we’re talking about fashion and I’m sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuchsia.Ĥ. I’d really rather you didn’t indulge in conduct that offends yourself, or your willing, consenting partner of legal age and mental maturity. I don’t require sacrifices and purity is for drinking water, not people.ģ. I’d really rather you didn’t judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, okay? Oh, and get this in your thick heads: woman = person. Besides, this isn’t about them so don’t change the subject.Ģ. I’d really rather you didn’t use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know, be mean to others. If some people don’t believe in me, that’s okay.
1. I’d really rather you didn’t act like a sanctimonious, holier-than-thou ass when describing my Noodly Goodness.
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